.jpg)
Photo by Soulful Pizza: https://www.pexels.com
I was cold;
You said I was not.
I was frightened;
You said I couldn't be.
I was angry;
You said I must be tired.
My emotions had no room,
No floor.
They were wrong,
Always wrong
I learned to doubt myself,
to assume I must be mistaken.
Feelings were wrong, and so were banished,
Shoved into an invisible box hidden deep inside
I walked in numbness
Wasting years
Before God awakened me,
Helping me to a new life
But learning to trust myself
is a slow journey,
believing in myself a lofty pinnacle,
accepting what my senses tell me,
another slow lesson
I walk in life,
trying and failing,
experiencing and shutting down,
rejoicing at freedom,
chaffing at old habits,
and fighting old thoughts
You, you'd say I was crazy
that I made up my past,
But I know better now.
You're in denial, and I won't join you--
Not anymore,
Not ever again!
HTML Comment Box is loading comments...
8 comments:
Beautiful.
Wow. I have few words in response just now. Yet I think many women can identify with this. Seems so from my experiences with Life Coaching & LifePlanning and speaking at retreats. And I get it, too. Thanks for sharing the poem.
Thank you, Jan and Joan, for leaving comments. It encourages me to keep risking putting my personal journey on the blog. I want to help others along on their own journeys of recovery and healing.
Thank you, Jan. It is sad how many have been raised by controlling parents or suffer under a controlling spouse. But healing is possible!
Hi. My name is Michelle. I've been reading some of your old posts and see so much of my thoughts here. I'm going to post this poem on my site...but wanted you to know. Of course, full credit will go to you. If this is a problem, please let me know.
Thank you for saying what I've been thinking.
www.considerjesus.wordpress.com
My friend Michelle pointed at the poem of yours. I must say, very poserful. Poignant. Each stanza makes (im)perfect sense to me. unfortunately.
Michelle,
Thanks for your comments and about letting me know that you were going to publish "Mind Control" on your blog. It is an honor. :)
Sorry it took so long to respond, I've been ill the past two years and reached a point where I couldn't keep posting. But I am doing way better again and look forward to returning to posting.
It is amazing how unique each specific abuse situation is and yet the feelings and thoughts are so similar. God bless you!
ricbooth,
It is unfortunate that so many know what abuse is about from the inside. I wish that no one had ever experienced abuse.
God bless your day and your journey of healing.
Post a Comment