I've never met a victim of abuse who has not been haunted by God questions sometime along the way. Where was God? Where was he when abuse happened to you or to a loved one? Why didn't he just stop it? He's all powerful so he could have stopped it. Why did he choose to allow it?
The questions are real and cut deeply. Were we not valuable enough to save? Didn't God care that our world was being torn apart by physical or emotional violence?
Some of you have heard of God rescuing others from a horrible crisis--so where was He when you needed him?
My heart goes out to all those who are in this spot. I've been there too and I know that it hurts. It hurts so much that I wouldn't look at it for a long time. When I finally did go there, I had a wise person tell me, "It's okay to tell God that you are angry and that you don't understand." I took the advice literally.
And God was okay with it. Over the months and years that have since passed, God has answered my questions. Not with placating or triteness. Not with politically correct answers. He answered with truth and with love. He answered using my personal Bible study, the sermons at church, things that children said, words on the radio, beautiful music lyrics, and the words of caring friends. He helped me to hear why He didn't rescue me in the way that I longed for.
Instead of finding a hollow, useless God, I've learned that God is more compassionate, more kind, more wise, and more powerful than I originally thought. I also found out that he cares about me in a very personal way and loves me more deeply than I ever would have thought possible. God does not leave us alone. He is with us in everything--even the most horrifying moments.
I also learned:
- God doesn't force people to do things; he invites them. We are not puppets--and neither are abusers. We all have free will. So sin happens.
- God abhors oppression and bondage. He hates violence.
- God is just, and justice will be done. God is never fooled. Mercy will be given to those who seek God--and justice will be given to those who cling to evil and refuse to seek God with sincerity.
- God instructs husbands and wives to treat each other well.
- God is never wrong, never fails, never lies, never breaks promises, and never abuses.
- God understands us better than we understands ourselves.
- God is good.
- God is pleased when we talk to him, even when we're mad.