Sunday, July 27, 2008

Working Backwards

Have you ever lost something and then walked yourself backwards through your day mentally, trying to figure out what happened? Sometimes walking backwards through other processes is easier as well. In the last post, I talked abut how beliefs influence our feelings and our feelings motivate behavior. Sometimes when I notice an unhealthy behavior pattern I am repeating, I start with the behavior and search backwards because I don't know why I am behaving as I am. I look at the behavior, figure out what feelings lead to the behavior and then search for the beliefs that fueled those feelings. To help myself examine an unwanted behavior I make a worksheet for myself:

Behavior I wish to change:

Feelings that lead me into this behavior:

Beliefs influencing me to feel that way:

No comments:

Recommended Books

  • 10 Lifesaving Principles for Women in Difficult Marriages by Karla Downing
  • A Way of Hope by Leslie J. Barner
  • Angry Men and the Women Who Love Them by Paul Hegstrom
  • Battered But Not Broken by Patricia Riddle Gaddis
  • Boundaries by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend
  • Bradshaw on the Family by John Bradshaw
  • Caring Enough to Forgive/Not Forgive by David Augsburger
  • Codependent No More by Melody Beattie
  • Healing the Wounded Heart by Dr. Dan B. Allendar
  • Keeping the Faith: Questions and Answers for the Abused Woman by Marie M. Fortune
  • Perfect Daughters by Robert J. Ackerman, Ph.D.
  • Recovery: A Guide for Adult Children of Alcoholics by Herbert L. Gravitz and Julie D. Bowden
  • Safe People by Dr Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend
  • Slay Your Own Dragons by Nancy Good
  • The Cinderella Syndrome by Lee Ezell
  • The Dance of Anger by Harriet Goldhor Lerner, Ph.D.
  • The Search for Significance by Robert S. McGee
  • Turning Fear to Hope by Holly Wagner Green
  • When Violence Comes Home: Help for Victims of Spouse Abuse by Tim Jackson and Jeff Olson
  • Why Does He Do That? by Lundy Bancroft